8 tips on how to raise tough and independent children

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There’s probably no bigger responsibility than raising children. Everything you do is going to affect their development as individuals. Think about it: the first five years of a life is its most formative and for your child, you are responsible for majority of what would take place in that time.

The thought is daunting and might make you want to micromanage everything your child does, especially if this is your first time to raise a person. But you have to remember that you cannot always be by your children’s side. You cannot constantly watch over them. You cannot be around forever to guard and protect them and to catch them after every fall.

But there is one thing that you can do that will definitely help them go through the bad times later on in life with as little trouble, difficulty, and pain as possible.

You can prepare them to be strong, confident, and self-reliant.

A great mom is supportive and nurturing. She does not hover, impose, nor demand too much from her children. Most importantly, she is aware that the key to raising #strongnotsheltered kids is to provide them with loving guidance coupled with just the right amount of parental control.

Here are some tips on how to go about this. 

 

1. Let them “bleed” a little.

Don’t come to them running or give in to their every whim just because they won’t stop crying until you do. Letting yourself be manipulated that way by your little tykes would inadvertently give them the impression that, whenever they turn on the waterworks or throw a tantrum, they can get away with anything. Consequently, they will grow up with a deep-seated sense of entitlement. Exposing them to certain levels of disappointment early on, on the other hand, will teach them to be patient and be mindful and considerate of others. 

 

2. Let them learn from their own mistakes.

Teach them that breaking rules always has its natural and inevitable consequences. Don’t make the habit of cleaning their mess. As young as toddlers, children should know that it is their responsibility to put away their toys after playtime. If they fail to do so, you can hide the toys until they promise to put those back in their proper boxes and bins when they are done playing. That will instill in them obedience and a sense of responsibility.

 

3. Let them explore and navigate their little world on their own.

Give them freedom to run around and try new things with other children their own age. Don’t be afraid to expose them to a little dirt, bacteria or germs - which, according to expects, could help them develop a healthy microbiome and immune system. They will learn to be independent and adventurous, and will grow up with stronger wings and a fearlessness to fly and soar high. 

 

4. Let them be aware of their imperfections, flaws and shortcomings.

As parents, we want to believe that our children are perfect creatures –that they are the epitome of beauty, brilliance, wit, compassion, and of every positive trait in the book. We tend to put them on a pedestal. This, however, would give our children the idea that they are better than everybody else and, as such, are beyond reproach. Let them earn every compliment and word of praise you give them. And you need to call them out on their mistakes and indiscretions if you want them to learn humility, tolerance and acceptance. 

 

5. Let them face their fears and fight their own battles.

When they fall flat on their face, don’t let them stay there. Make them get back on their feet, dust themselves off and start all over again. They should learn to test their limits, to develop the courage to pursue their dreams, and to stand up and speak their minds. They will grow up into men and women of courage, resilience, independence and strong character. 

 

6. Let them earn their keep.

They would soon realize that free-riders never get far in this world. Assign them tasks and chores that they should accomplish with due diligence. This would teach them the dignity of hard work and the values of excellence and discipline. 

 

7. Let them know who the boss is in your family - and, definitely, it is not them.

As parents, and the real bosses in your home, you should set rules and a corresponding set of rewards (for obedience and compliance) and punishment (for offenses and misbehavior) for your children that you will strictly and consistently impose. Rudeness, dishonesty and cruelty should never be tolerated in any home. Help raise a generation of citizens that holds in high regard such qualities as respect (for rules, the authority, other people and other people’s time, the elders, the environment and themselves), honesty, integrity and compassion. 

 

8. Let them discover their interests, joys, talents, passions and potentials.

Let their creative juices flow freely. Provide them with free time to play, daydream and roam around in the backyard. Never, under any circumstance, impose your unrealized dreams on them. Let them think and make their own educated choices and opinions. Make them feel more in control of their world. This will promote love of learning and education in your kids. They will grow up with that ingrained thirst and hunger for knowledge.

Independence has its corresponding cost, though. Your children will need all the nourishment that their bodies will require to respond to the challenge of breaking free from your apron strings. They will need a steady supply of reliable nutrition like Anchor Full Cream Milk. Anchor Full Cream Milk is made of 100% whole milk, which is derived from fresh cow’s milk in its purest and unadulterated form. It has not undergone artificial process and, as such, the vital nutrients, vitamins and minerals it contains are easily absorbed by the body unlike artificially formulated filled milk. Anchor comes from a trusted source in the New Zealand which has been there for over a hundred years now. - INQUIRER.net/LoreleiAquino